The Your Mom song

First off, let me appologize up front if this offends anybody and if you are easily offended by mom jokes don't even bother reading this, but at the request of my one faithful reader of this blog I am going to post this song parody. It is to the tune of "Gaston" from "Beauty and the Beast"(is nothing sacred anymore). So anyway, here it goes...

Gosh it disturbs me to stand here in line,
Waiting for someone to hump.
Every guy here is waiting on your mom,
Just to stick it in her rump.
There's no gal in town as admired as her,
She's favorite to all of the guys.
Everyone's awed and inspired by her,
And it's not very hard to see why.......

No one F**ks like your mom, no one s**ks like your mom,
No one lets c*m dribble down their chin like your mom.
For there's no girl in town who's as trampy,
She's so impure what a whore,
You can ask any Tom, Dick or Stanley
and they'll tell you just why they stand outside her door.....

No one humps like your mom, no one pumps like your mom,
No one takes on football teams at once like your mom.
As a specimen yes she's intimidating
My what a gal your mom.

Give five hurahs, give twelve hip hips,
Cause we all had your mom and didn't get the drip

No one flirts like you mom, no one squirts like your mom
no one says "put it right where it hurts" like your mom
For there's no girl in town who's as slutty,
As you see she's got loving to spare,
though her boobs are a little bit saggy,
She has U.S.M.C. carved in her pubic hair.

No one mounts like your mom, tells sperm count like your mom,
No one swallows a money shot down like your mom
No she doesn't believe in expectorating
All hail the porn queen your mom.

There it is, for my one faithful reader, it is still a work in progress and still quite offensive, so again if you didn't find yourself getting a small chuckle out of this and are totally offended I humbly appologize.